Some say to survive it: You need to be as mad as a hatter.....Which luckily I am!!

There is a place. Like no place on Earth. A land full of wonder, mystery, and danger! Some say to survive it: You need to be as mad as a hatter.....Which luckily I am!

Ha sometimes I believe the only reason I survive everyday is because I'm as mad as the Mad Hatter.I believe this gets me through day by day. Since college has started my life has gone up down ,left, right, just every which way. But I know a few things.

• Dependable -reliable ,always there.This is the best word to describe my girls. I haven't had much luck in my life in keep people around but my girls have been there for me no matter what is going on in my life at that time.If I cry they are there with a shoulder for me to cry on. If I'm sick they text me to see how I'm or stop by. And times when I just wanna be left alone they are still there helping me in whatever issue i'm having at that time or whatever is bothering me.
• Unconditional love -to love someone regardless of one's actions or beliefs. My mom is the only person who could love me no matter what I've done. I honestly believe my mom is one of the only good hearted people left in this world. I get my good heart from her I can tell. No matter what I do she loves me just the way I am.Haha like for example every since I was a little girl I told her I wanted a tattoo. So she would get mad but laugh at the fact i always drawed on my self with pen.
• It's funny how my mom can do little things to cheer me up when I need her the most.The other night my mom bought me a card and a gift. Just that little gift made a world of difference to me. It made me feel loved , it made me feel wanted, if just made me feel that everything was ok and that nothing was wrong.Just little things like this in life make me who I am. I have a few people around that love me for and that are always around :).

I'm With the Party Rock Crew all Drinks are free!

sadly last week my last concert for February come and went.My mom and I went to see The Black Eyed Peas,Ludacris, and LMFAO in concert at Rupp Arena. Only one word could explain that concert...AMAZING! LMFAO which is small band from Los Angeles that consists of Redfoo (Stefan Gordy) and Sky Blu (Skyler Gordy) rocked. The band plays Electro-hop which is also known as electronic rap .LMFAO is know for the Party Rock crew which is what they call their fans and groupies when they do after parties. I wouldn't advise LMFAO for anyone who doesn't like suggestive lyrics because believe me there are many sexual and lyrics about drinking.

"Shake your money maker like somebody 'bout to pay ya"

The next act which beside LMFAO i love is Ludacris. Ludacris is the 1st rapper from my childhood that I learned every word to at least two of his songs in about two days. I'm not proud but learning his lyrics took me into my love of poetry and music. So being there with my mom bought back my memories of being in her car and hearing the 1st Ludacris song.Ludacris did a few songs then it was the moment everyone had been waiting for.....

THE BLACK EYED PEAS!!!!

The Black eyed peas made grand entrance! They came out of the floor on tramalines which was amazingly cool! They played about every song I could think of for them. Also each member got there chance to come out in there own way and sang there own songs. Will.I.Am came out twice. The 1st time he came out and did a freestyle using the messages that people had messaged to his blackberry phone. It was great!!!! Then Apl.De.Ap come out and had these robotic style women dancing all over him as he sung to songs off the new album The E.N.D. Then Fergie came out looking very beatuiful and song a few songs off her album she had out a while back. Then Taboo last but not least did a few songs :) Easy was to sum up the concert was it was an amaxing expericnce!!!

"I am Jeri’s broken heart. Living in a World so cold Wasted away"

I have my mother's Big heart and my fathers big brown eyes. So I guess you can say I've seen and felt alot of pain in my short little soon to be 19 years. With my mother's heart I care far to much for people only to get hurt or left behind by them. I guess if you want you can say it's a down fall. Which I fear will lead my heart to in end get me hurt worst then ever before. I try to live my life to the fullest but fear causes me to step back some and be scared to get out there.

My week started ok till I had to go to work Monday. I hate Mondays.It seems to me to be the slowest day of the week. Like it will never pass I'll be stuck in Monday forever. Well this Monday started at the same as every other. I woke up late for work but seem to get back on track after a few minutes.It looked like i was going to have extra time so I decided to head to Starbucks before i had to drag myself into work. I walked in and got my fave vanilla latte which seems to always make my day better. But today it didn't it seemed like normal coffee to me. I really didn't think much of it as chugged it on my walk to the office.I still find it funny in the ice and cold i rather walk everywhere so i can get my thoughts together.Well when i walked in everyone was there and everything seemed normal. Everyone was laughing having fun. So I sit down and clocked in. I tried to tune everyone out for a minute or to so I could get my thoughts in order. My boss came in with her cheery self like she does every morning. I guess I never really noticed it until this morning of all days.

"Good Morning Ladies" Paula said with a smile.

"Good Morning Ms. Dunn" Priscilla said.

"Good Morning Paula" I said.She kind of smiled and walked to her office. It has become a daily routine in office.One that I'm not sure of but it makes me feel welcomed.

I'll never be sure why little things like this stand in my memory verses other things in my life. But it does.I haven't had many bosses in my life just 4. But out of all of them i have the most fun being in the office with Paula.I'm Letting my random brain get the best of me now. Thinking of what will happen if Paula really leaves. Sometimes I get the feel I'm like Jack in Fight Club.Sometime in the office I feel I’m six years old again, passing messages between my parents. I am Jack’s broken heart. Kind of like A cloud hangs over,and mutes my happiness.A thousand ships couldn't sail me back from distress. I need to stop my brain. I need to stop this thinking. She can't leave she can't.

"First my father leaves me, now you. I’m all alone. I am Jeri’s Broken Heart." It's funny how you can change movie quotes to fit you at that moment. Like the I am Jeri' Broken Heart. Fight Club memory swirl around my head. Underneath the shadow of mistakes I have made I feel like I'm breaking inside. I don't want to fall and say I lost it all. Cause there's a part of me that is about to hit the wall Leaving pieces of me behind.

"Dear Agony, Life Starts Now!!! Sincerely, Memento Mori"

Ahh this week has finally has arrived. I've been waiting for this week for a month and a half. Last night was the Three Days Grace, Breaking Benjamin, and Flyleaf Concert at Rupp Arena. It was amazing, my girls, Jay and I enjoyed it so so so much. For those who have No idea who they are Flyleaf is a little band from Texas that play what I and many others like to can "Christan Rock". Most of the songs faith influences but lead singer Lacey Mosley doesn't necessarily believe that makes Flyleaf strictly a Christian band. Breaking Benjamin is the perfect head banging music. Breaking Benjamin(named for the lead singer Benjamin Burnley)is an American alternative metal band . Their music is also classified as Post-grunge. Three Days Grace's musical style has generally been described as alternative metal and Hard rock throughout the band's career. In a review of the band's debut album, compared them to rock bands Chevelle and Helemet. They have also been described as "heavy and catchy, with chewy chunks of assurance and fury thrown in for added measure and accessible alt-metal attack of blunt lyrics and crunching rhythms" that retains the melodic sound of its predecessor "despite its lyrical darkness”. According to the lead singer Adam Goniter the band’s influences style is “ Musically there's a lot of different influences, but lyrically it's hard to have different influences because you just write.”

But not trying to be religious but last night the devil was on me. After see Flyleaf play. Jay decided he needed to smoke and the girls needed Drinks. So Jess and I went with Jay, on our way to the smoking area Jay gets a text message from his ex-girlfriend asking him to meet her before he went back to his section. Now keep in mind she is at the concert with another guy. Little back story- I can't stand this girl. she has done nothing but toy with my boy Jay's heart and I'm sick and tired of it! I'm one of the nicest sweetest people you'll ever meet but you mess with my friends and family then i am a very different person.

But anyway, He met her and I asked Jess to stay with me till she left well I saw him hug her and almost kiss and all heck flew through me. I just looked at Jess and said "LETS GO NOW!!!!!!!!!" Jess just looked at me for a second and then ran when I got up to her. Jay finally caught up to us when we got back to our section. He kept asking me what was wrong and I kept saying knowing I just wanted to yell at him. He's like "she said Jeri really doesn't like me does she?" Then he said she was talking about me. Here is my theory, if you say something to my face rather then behind my back I'm less likely to snap because you were man/woman enough to say it to my face. But this chick wasn't woman enough to say it to me.." So Snitches and Talkers Get Stitches and Walkers!" ha ha.Kidding.. But back to the concert it was GREAT!!! We got pictures made with to Radio Personality from Z-Rock 103 Johnny Maze and Twitch! We are HUGE fans of theirs.

But the concert was amazing! Our seats were right next to the stage which meant we were right next to the bass. Which sounded like a good idea at the time but by the time we left Our ears seem to ring like bell from the beating of the bass. And we felt like our faces had melted off from the pyotechnics that Three days Grace used during there set.It was funny the next day because we posted things on Rupps facebook page and one of the MarketingBut it was a Great Night :)

(For Everyone Wondering about the title of this Blog it's the names of the bands CDs.Dear Agony is Breaking Benjamin's New CD title.Life Starts now is Three Days Grace's and also the name of the tour .Then Memento Mori is Flyleaf's title and is Latin for "be mindful of death" or "remember you will die.")

"Just let me clear my head I think I've had too much You're so disappointing"

Monophobia: The Fear of being alone. Empty by yourself no one around.

Recently I find myself lost more and more in the shuffle of college life. I kind of live a very boring one because I never do anything outside of homework and working. I mean there is the weekend outing with the girls or my mom but other then that well....nothing. For example I spent my weekend doing homework and watching the pregnancy Pact on Lifetime. I was suppose to spend the weekend with my girls ,Deven and Jay. But Deven had to work, Jess was moving so Jay was helping and Nikki and Leah are sick and had to work this weekend. Ugggh...I don't know.

I need to get out of my shell of little old Georgetown and see what comes of me in Lexington. I don't want to lose me in the process and I don't think my family and friends want to lose me either.I'm looking forward to Next week! It's the Three Days Grace,Breaking Benjamin and Flyleaf Concert! I'm ready to see it with my girls.It will be so much funny and we are right next to the stage which will be amazing!Maybe if I try to make more friends outside my little ring of friends life on UK's campus would be a little eaiser.Or maybe not. I just don't know. It's like I want to get out but have a fear of being the outsider and not being liked by others. But If Jess is right then no one can resit being friends with me. :)

“A smile is the Shortest distance between two people”

“That smile of your Makes my heart beat like an 808 drum”

This weekend I have to say was one of the best I’ve had in a while :).I was a little home sick all week and talking to my friends on facebook wasn’t helping either. So they decided I would come home for the weekend. So I went home so I could go bowling with my girls, my best friend’s boyfriend Peter and our guy friend Jay. At first I wasn’t looking forward to it very much because the guy I liked wasn’t going to be there. When I invited him to come he told me he just started a new job and worked nights so he wouldn’t be able to come. I was so sad I really didn’t want to go after that but I knew my girls would be mad at me if I skipped out on them because of a guy. So I went when we got there, it was just me my friends Jess, Jay and Lele. So we went ahead and got our lanes, shoes and bowling balls. While we were waiting for the others my friend Jay kept saying he was waiting for someone and he wondered where they were. Me and the girls just thought he had a new girlfriend and we were about to meet her or something. So none of us really thought anything else about it. My friends all slowly one by one started rolling in till we were all there. Then finally I heard Jay say they’re here, I turned around to see the guy that I have the biggest crush on Deven standing behind me. Jay looks at me and kind of gives me that you owe me one for this look. All I could do was smile, Just the Idea of Deven being there made my whole night. I missed my girl but getting to see the guy that I’ve liked since my Junior year of high school made it to the top of the list along with seeing my girls .

“Gone But Never Forgotten”

On January 23,2010 a good friend of mine passed away from an Overdose. It’s kind of hard because I was just talking to him the other day about how he was going to clean up his life for his baby girl. He was a good person he just had a few issue that needed to be fixed. His daughter now will never know her daddy. It’s painful for friends to lose someone but it’s even more painful for a child to lose someone and not understand what is going on.My thought and Prays are with the family of Matthew "Shak" Shackelford.I'll miss you man, I still can't believe your gone.

“Gone Too Soon”

You took chances
Once too many times.
As a child you thought -
"Oh no, never me."
Life is a gift,
Given and taken at some
Unknown time.
Your time came too soon -
Your life was over in a flash.
The fun you shared,
The joy you brought,
All just a memory -
Behind us.

R.I.P.

Matthew "Shak" Shackelford

Dec 8th, 1989-Jan 23rd, 2010

Gone But Never Forgot

beginning of a beatuiful Adventure

Well this happens to be the 1st blog. Yay! Well to tell you about my life. I'm from a little town in Kentucky. My town was named for General Charles Scott. So as you can guess I from Scott County or Georgetown. The only thing my town is famous for is well... a Toyota plant. The sad part is if Toyota wasn't there my town wouldn't be either. Everything is built around Toyota and everyone that lives there works there to. It kind sad that if you don’t make it out of Georgetown you more than likely will end up working at Toyota. It’s sad when people get amazes because someone got out of that little one horse town. I'm not downing my town or Toyota by any means. I love it, it's just I want something more.

"The Goals and Dreams of a Dreamer"
I have dreams and hopes of getting out and getting into a big city. There are so many things I plan to do. I want to be a graphic designer with a minor in Photography. I love photography and just like my photography I’m random. I also love writing and drawing and dancing. I’ve been dancing since I was a little girl. It was part of my mom plan to make me girly so she started me in ballet as a child and my love has grown since then. Currently I just left my little town to go to college. But i'm not too far from home. I moved to Lexington, which is about 30min from my hometown, for a little. I did this in order to live out my dream of a college education. I love it but hate it at the same time. There are so many things I love but that I hate.

"Everybody needs a support system"

I love that I’ve met new people and gotten out of Georgetown for a little. But at the same time I miss my family and my friends. My family is basically my support system.My family is mostly made up single mom that have done everything in their power to make sure their kids had everything they wanted and need. I miss them, but most of all I miss my mom. It’s been us for so long that I’m lost without her. She’s also living her dream of getting her MBA and I’m just as proud of her as she is of me if not more.It's funny how we get mad at each other and bump head but i wouldn't trade her for anything!It's all part of being mother and daughter. Besides having my mom as my best friends I have seven best friends and I wouldn’t them for the world.

They go by the names of Leah, Nikki, Kara, Jess, Gracie, Amber and Jay. I love them all they have been their when the rest of the world has walked out on me.Jay is My best Guy friend. He's been there when i've needed someone to talk to about guys or just a shoulder to cry on. So have My girls but Jay does it from a guys stand point. Leah, Gracie and Amber all have kids that I call my nieces and nephew and well they are more like sisters then friends. Their mom’s have pretty much adopted me and my mom has pretty much adopted them and Nikki too!!! Their Kids Robbie, Bailey and Jaclyn are my fave little kids beside my little cousins. (Picture: Jaclyn Noel,My Niece)

"Dreaming In quotations"

I basically live my life in quotes. It’s funny how many I find that I fall in love♥ with that I live life by or repeat over and over. Here are just a few that I ♥:

♥Two weeks together is all it took..two weeks for me 2 fall for you~Dear John
♥Her:the way people act around u is like their scared of you.
Him: we'll their scared of how i use to be
Her: U don't scare me john
Him: But u scare me~Dear John

♥"Be very careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. The woman came out of a man's rib, not from his feet to be walked on, not from his head to be superior, but from his side to be equal! Under the arm to be protected, & next to the heart to be loved. "
♥philippians 4:13 -I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
♥Never say things Could always be worst God takes that as a Personal Challenge.-Sqecial Button
♥" Tell them to look up. Tell them to remember the stars The stars are always there but we miss them in the dirt and clouds. We miss them in the storms. Tell them to remember hope. We have hope." -Renee
♥I'm gonna go stand outside. So when someone asks where I am you can tell them.. Im outstanding-Shay Fields

♥Joshua 1:9-Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God [is] with thee whithersoever thou goest.

Some come from friends or songs or stories I’ve read and sometimes even the bible. Well I guess i'll go work on the blog for my niece i'll Link them. there will be a link on the left for it called Dear Jaclyn,. That is enough for now I’ll post some picture and been done with this for the night.☮♥ ☺